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Ranking the SEC (after Championship Week)

Obviously there won’t be too many changes between this week’s rankings and last week’s. Actually, there aren’t any changes at all, but I did give some final thoughts on each team. Those are just awesome, so you should at least have a read.

1. LSU – Even with a mediocre-at-best offense, the Tigers still ended up dominating every opponent. When their defense isn’t scoring points, they are giving their offense a short field. I don’t have time to look up the stat, but I bet you at least half of LSU’s points scored this year were on drives of less than 50 yards. I guess you don’t have to dominate all aspects of the game, just as long as you are the best at one. Hmmm…that sounds familiar.

2. Alabama – They sat at home, did nothing, and still got in the Championship game. And I’m such an idiot for thinking that’s a travesty to the game. Such an idiot homer barner, I am.

3. Arkansas – And this concludes the list of the really good teams in the SEC. The Razorbacks might actually jump to the absolute top tier next year, but don’t we say that every year?

4. South Carolina – The Gamecocks remain above Georgia because they beat the Bullpups and their records are close enough. If Stephen Garcia beat them, there’s no telling what Shaw would do to them.

5. Georgia – Mark Richt is almost as lucky as Les Miles. Just when you think he’s out, the rest of the SEC East decides to throw up on itself and give the Dawgs an easy ride. They wouldn’t have won 4 games if they were in the West.

6. Auburn – Let’s just get better in the bowl game, boys. Please?

7. Florida – Before Spurrier, Florida was never considered a national power. In fact they had never won a SEC Championship until he showed up. Since he left, besides a few years with Tebow, Florida has been pretty mediocre. You know, like they had always really been. Maybe things just don’t look too bright because things are back to normal.

8. Mississippi State – If Dan Mullen goes to Penn State, can I have the huge mural of him on the side of the stadium?

9. Vanderbilt – James Franklin is pretty much set for life considering the contract extension he just got, or is about to get. I’m not really sure. Sorry, I don’t keep up with the Commodores that much. What happens when he leaves after next season for a high-end Big 12 or ACC school? Nobody will know. They’ll all be studying.

10. Kentucky – Congrats to the Wildcats for crawling out of the cellar after looking like the worst team in SEC history earlier this season. Joker Philips will be sending Houston Nutt and Derek Dooley fruit baskets for Christmas this year.

11. Tennessee – Does Dooley make it past the offseason without losing his job? I don’t really know, but if he does, I want his pants.

12. Ole Miss – The Rebels have hired the coach from The Blind Side. No, not the actor. The actual coach of Micheal Oher. He had been at Arkansas State and turned them into a respectable cupcake. Let’s see if he can do the same with Ole Miss.

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