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Week 5 Predictions

Leave it to Clemson to ruin a perfectly good week. Haven’t they done that in some other instance before? Oh well, I’m going on four straight weeks of only one incorrect prediction. Start putting your money on me folks. It will get you somewhere.

Last Week: 7-1
This Week: 4-4
Overall: 37-8 (82.2%)


Texas A&M vs. Arkansas (Cowboys Stadium) – I picture Texas A&M coming in to the SEC next season at the Arkansas level. By that I mean usually pretty decent and can knock off one of the elite every year, but just not ready to take over. Texas A&M is near the top of the Big 12 this year, which is near the 2nd level of the SEC. That won’t change before next season.

Arkansas is too one dimensional and the Aggies should have beaten a very explosive Oklahoma State last week. I have a feeling this game will be a close one, but the Aggies will win. The question is will the fans chant “SEC! SEC! SEC!” after doing so?

Texas A&M 35, Arkansas 31

Arkansas 42, Texas A&M 38FAILURE

Mississippi State at Georgia – Aww poor puppies… Georgia was supposed to roll over an easy schedule with “the best quarterback in the SEC.” Mississippi State was poised and ready to take it to the next level. Nope. Although I wouldn’t mind if they both lost, I think it’s time we put the Mullendogs to bed. Georgia is better anyway.

Georgia 28, Mississippi State 13

Georgia 24, Mississippi State 10SUCCESS!

Kentucky at LSU – How many different ways can I say that Kentucky is terrible? How about this… Kentucky ist schrecklich. That’s “Kentucky is terrible” in German. This is fun, let’s try another one… LSU-Fans sind Betrunkene, die wie corndogs riechen. I think you can figure that one out.

LSU wins big, and after the game Les Miles says to Joker Philips, “Hey man, you got any of that bluegrass?”

LSU 30, Kentucky 7

LSU 35, Kentucky 7 SUCCESS!

Buffalo at Tennessee – Buffalo is 2-0 after an exciting win over the Patriots last week. Oh wait, sorry, wrong team. The Buffalo Bills are decent, the Buffalo Bulls are not. Let’s just hope they don’t have a live mascot on the field or Derek Dooley and his pants won’t survive. (Bulls are angered by loud, bright colors.)

Tennessee 48, Buffalo 3

Tennessee 41, Buffalo 10 SUCCESS!

Alabama at Florida – I really have no clue on this one. I’d normally say Alabama would win pretty big, but the fact that it’s in the Swamp and AJ McCarron hasn’t played in a hostile atmosphere yet makes me think that Florida can save the country and get a big win. Oh, who cares? Let’s do this.

Florida 24, Alabama 21

Alabama 38, Florida 10FAILURE

Ole Miss at Fresno State – This isn’t going to look good for the SEC. A downtrodden Rebel Black Bear team will fly across the country to play a late game against a team that can score points. Fresno State will play their hearts out to put an SEC win on their resume, regardless of the fact that Ole Miss probably won’t have an SEC win on their resume by the end of the season. I figure most Ole Miss fans are expecting a loss, but will the administration let Houston Nutt fly back on the team plane if they do lose?

Fresno State 34, Ole Miss 24

Ole Miss 38, Fresno State 28 FAILURE

Other Games of Note

Clemson at Virginia Tech – Like last week, I’m not trying to downplay Clemson just because I’m mad they beat Auburn. They just aren’t as good as their record and resume appears. Sure, they beat Florida State last week, but the Seminoles were without their starting quarterback. Auburn didn’t have Cam Newton either, so that game just wasn’t fair.

Virginia Tech is known for blowing games against ranked opponents, but the fact that it’s in their place makes me believe they’ll break Cinderella’s glass slipper right over their knee…and then block a punt.

Virginia Tech 28, Clemson 21

Clemson 23, Virginia Tech 3 FAILURE

Nebraska at Wisconsin – Oh look, Wisconsin is playing a team with a pulse. We’ll finally get to see if they are ready to become the Big 10  team that has to play one tough game a season and eventually lose to an SEC school in the National Championship game. Actually, now that Nebraska is in the Big 10, they are in the same boat. So basically whoever wins this game is going to be in the National Championship game. There, I said it. Mark it down.

Wisconsin hasn’t played anybody, but they look pretty good, and this game is at home for them.

Wisconsin 38, Nebraska 31

Wisconsin 48, Nebraska 17 SUCCESS!

**Upset Special**

Texas at Iowa State – Gene Chizik’s recruits are 3-0 and will be hyped to play a weaker-than-normal Texas team. The Cyclone fans will take a few hours break from the corn field and get their home stadium as loud as lots of white farmers can make it be. I’m normally just wishfully thinking with my Upset Specials, but I really think this one could happen.

Iowa State 17, Texas 14

Texas 37, Iowa State 14 FAILURE

Twit-Fam Prediction

Auburn at South Carolina – I don’t think there have ever been this many Twit-Fam predictions that foresee an Auburn loss in the history of Twit-Fam predictions. Get your head up people! We gotta game to win! Who cares what your friends say?! March to your own beat! Make your own decisions! What are you doing with your life?! I have no idea where I was going with that. Oh well, I hope all you naysayers are wrong.

The Twit-Fam is getting more and more creative each week. Along with a few of the score predictions, one person predicted 4 visor throws for Spurrier. Another predicted 8 naked women in Garcia’s bedroom. Both numbers are a little low, but I applaud the effort.

Auburn 31, South Carolina 28

Auburn 16, South Carolina 13 SUCCESS!

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J 09/29/2011 at 5:36 pm

LSU fans are drunks that smell like corndogs.

I guess minoring in German wasn’t completely useless.

harryhood41 09/29/2011 at 7:53 pm

I think Arkansas will finally be able to run the ball against TAMU, something they couldn’t do last week. I’m taking Arkansas. I also think MSU will upset the “Dawgs” from Georgia. War Eagle

Pat Bryant 10/02/2011 at 9:57 am

Please pick Boston College over Cinderella this week.

Week 7 Predictions - 10/13/2011 at 10:53 pm

[…] a poor showing in week 5, I went safe with my picks last week and gained a little more dignity. Aside from the Auburn game, […]


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