The Pregame Blogle: Auburn 🐯 vs. Baylor 🐻
Football season is here. We’ve waited all year. We’ve been (mostly) good. We deserve it. Talking season is over. The made up storylines go away. How many more short sentences can I type? Let’s jump in to the Baylor Bears versus your Auburn Tigers.
🎄 HOW I’M FEELING
I treat the first football game like Christmas. I try not to think about it until it’s very close. Otherwise, I’m just waiting on it for months. But that usually means the game sneaks up on me and I don’t know anything.
This year, I’ve tried to get into it a little earlier. The new website design kinda helped and hurt that. But I got a Phil Steele magazine and a magnifying glass, and I’ve been really trying to catch up.
It doesn’t help that college football has been ruined by the transfer portal, but anyway…
I’m excited. I wish the game was at Jordan-Hare, but I also like just being able to go to a game, not build a tailgate, and walk into an air-conditioned building. I don’t know that I would’ve felt that way a decade ago. But I’m 44 now.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m ready to tailgate, but for the first game, it’s not a bad thing to just go in, watch, and go home.
As far as the actual game, I feel good. I feel like Auburn is better. I feel like the crowd will be 80% Auburn. I feel like it’s going to be a fun day.
🤷 WHAT WE ACTUALLY KNOW
Nothing. We know nothing. They’ve played zero football games.
But we know Auburn has a good, proven quarterback. We know Baylor’s coach is a defensive guy and will be gone if they don’t win this year. We know Baylor’s quarterback is at Baylor because he couldn’t cut it at Florida.
That’s about all we know.
👀 WHAT I WANT TO SEE
I want a comfortable 17+ point win. I want to see Byrum Brown run over somebody and throw for 350. I want to see the defense score. I want to see a kickoff return for a touchdown. I want no injuries.
I don’t want to spend the 3rd quarter wondering if Baylor is about to mount a comeback.
I want the parking to be easy, the pregame/tailgate activities to be fun, and the traffic to be light on the way home.
🥱 THE STORYLINE I’M ALREADY TIRED OF
Alex Golesh, Byrum Brown, and the rest of USF beat Florida last year. Florida’s quarterback was DJ Lagway, who is now Baylor’s quarterback.
This, of course, has brought on the cheap storyline that Saturday’s game is DJ Lagway’s chance to get back at Golesh and Brown.
This insinuates that Lagway not being good enough at Florida to beat USF was due to something besides himself. Maybe his 5-star ranking was wrong. Maybe he’s just not that good. That doesn’t mean it’s Auburn’s — or Golesh’s or Byrum’s — job to take the fall on the first stop of his self-inflicted revenge tour.
Try again.
🐻 RANDOM OPPONENT THING
Dr Pepper was invented in Waco, Texas, the home of Baylor University. In fact, they used to give Dr Pepper to the live bear mascot until they realized Dr Pepper isn’t good for bears. Who knew?
Inexplicable Bonus: USA Today somehow named the Baylor Line the #1 College Football Walk-Out Tradition. This is where Baylor freshmen run onto the field before the game (because they never have reasons to rush the field after the game) to form a tunnel for the team to run through.
Seriously. That’s it.
📈 BLOGLE CONFIDENCE METER
8.2 out of 10 — There’s no reason to think a team that has should be much improved with a coach hellbent on proving he’s the right man should lose to a team that should be worse than the one that lost by 2 touchdowns in a home game last year. And Auburn will have the crowd advantage.
🔒 ONE THING I GUARANTEE
Cam Newton will be mentioned 15 times on the broadcast. He’s Auburn’s honorary captain, so he and Byrum Brown’s stature will give the TV crew plenty of chances.
Bonus: Alex Golesh will say a funny cuss word to whoever interviews him postgame.
🎯 THE PICK
Auburn 42, Baylor 17
I am expecting an offensive explosion from Auburn, like when Gus showed up and nobody knew how to stop it. The defense will give up an early big play because that’s what happens in these games, but they’ll settle in and have at least one score.
The crowd will be 80/20 Auburn. It will feel like a bowl game, which will be fun since I don’t remember what those feel like. I still can’t feel my hands from Auburn’s last bowl game.
I’m trying not to let my excitement for the season starting bleed into my homerism, but I really think it’s going to be a fun day for Auburn fans.
